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Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?, Paris

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Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?, Paris
See all Paris Local Customs
Hapless glove seeks its mate - Paris
Hapless glove seeks its mate
by BeatChick
Paris Local Customs: Travel tips and advice posted by real travelers and Paris locals.
Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?
• 32 Photos
• 76 Reviews
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Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Different Cultures, Different Practices
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  • When entering a shop in Paris, you are expected to say hello. The shop clerk's job is to serve you; you need to announce your intention so she would know what to do. If you only want to look around, say so. If you want to look at merchandise, say "May I...?" If the merchandise is not in plain view, ask to see it. Do not reach up and do not rifle.

    In a clothing store, do not try on innumerable articles just to see how they look on you. After you pick out a couple of items that you would like to purchase, tell the clerk you are going to make a decision after comparing them. In the end, if you decide you don't want anything, thank her for her trouble. When walking out of the shop, whether after a purchase or just a look-see, always say goodbye and thank you.

    Shopping is the first encounter that usually leads to an immediate opinion in the mind of most travellers. As Americans, we are used to wandering in shops, checking things out, touching this and that, and then taking it to the cashier, all without much personal attention. Think of the reverse, now. Think of times when you were young and your Mom took you to a general store; the first thing she told you were "Don't touch" and then the man behind the counter said, "How may I help you?" The question was not rhetorical then and it is still not now in Europe.

    In the restaurant, don't expect the waiter to come asking if everything is fine with your meal. Waitstaff in the US earn their living upon tips; thus, they check on customers often and make sure the tables are turned over in timely matter. In Europe, besides the fact that tips are not required, meals are social events and there is no rush. If you don't ask for the check, no one will give it to you. If you need something from the waiter, discreetly signal instead of calling out for his attention.

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: The French are friendly! Really!
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  • The stereotype of the rude Parisian could not be further from the truth. In my trips to Paris I've actually found that the French are some of the nicest people around and they will literally go out of their way to help you.

    How to stay on the good side of Parisians:

    1. TRY to speak French. They know that your French stinks, but they appreciate it when you try. They'll probably reply in English just to make it easier for both of you. But showing a little respect by attempting to speak their language is a good way to go.

    2. Don't inconvenience them. Parisians hate to be inconvenienced. They don't mind stopping to help you out, but they hate it when you hold up lines or block sidewalks. DON'T ask 50 questions of the ticket seller in the Metro if there's a long line behind you. DON'T stop in the middle of the sidewalk if crowds are trying to get by.

    3. Don't be so darn loud. Americans aren't the only ones guilty of this. In fact, there are other nationalities even louder than us. In general, the French speak in softer tones-- particularly in public places like restaurants. They find it rude when you carry on loud conversations in places like this.

    If it's your first visit to Paris, I bet you'll be surprised at how lovely and accomodating the people are. I've come to truly love and respect the French and always enjoy my stay in Paris!

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: innocent unless proven guilty
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  • I've been living in France for 10 years now. I'm English (from London) and married to a French (very French!) girl. I've been around the clock and would like to give a few survival tips to any foreigners coming to Paris.

    1) as with law; innocent unless proven guilty, in Paris you're an arsehole unless proven otherwise. This might not help you, but it helps to be warned that it's rare to be welcomed with big smiles and open arms (like in most big cities come to think of it). I might just add that France has a long history of being invaded and occupied and so the French are wary of strangers, more than any other nation, and do not give away smiles for free. Speaking of which...
    2) Smiles won't get you far (they'll think you want something from them). Respect will. The French have an inbred inferiority complex. Bow down to them, show them you NEED their help and that without their help you'd be dead, and you'll get what you want!
    3) Parisians stare. Don't worry. They don't think it's rude. So don't worry.
    4) Paris has an illegal immigration problem and has had some pretty bad (mostly non existent) integration schemes for ethnic minorities. Result is high crime rates and racism. Watch your bags etc in the metro. Common sense. If you are black, you may have trouble getting into night clubs etc. sad to say so, but you have to work around this... dress well, go with a white friend!
    5) Superficial is not a word that the french know. Either they like the look of you or they don't. At least you know where you stand! It's quite a struggle to break the barrier. Say you hate George Bush and Tony Blair and you've got a friend for life, wherever you come from! speaking of which...
    6) French talk about everything while they eat: politics, sex, personal problems. It's not considered impolite.
    I could go on for ever but I have to go out now. Any Q's or comments... pop me a mail!

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Kind French People
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  • Nice man who told me Bienvenue! - Paris
    Nice man who told me
    Bienvenue!
    by BeatChick, 3 more photos
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    This tip is in an effort to dispel the myth of the "rude French people". Sure, there's bound to be a rude Parisian or two out there - every culture has them, but for the most part I found the French to be extremely kind, helpful, curious about our culture, & very polite.

    One of the kindest things that ever happened to me was when I got lost on the RER. I took the WRONG direction! About the time we pulled into the Stade de France stop was when I noticed. I got out looking about me in a very confused fashion. Out on the platform was a lovely French gentleman who could barely speak English yet he helped me get to the other side. I was having trouble conveying to him what went wrong so eventually I just pointed to the other side. He took my hand, walked me down the stairs took me to the other side & pointed me the way. Very kind gentleman & since then I've had a difficult time understanding this stupid stereotype of the rude French people. It's been my experience that they are very kind & willing to help and are especially helpful when I've made the attempt to communicate in their language!

    During my trip in 2003, I was doing my best to use my (limited) French. I went to Nectarine, used French to order cafe, s'il vous plait, use the right gestures to get the check (l'addition, s'il vous plait). As I went to pay the bill, a young man told me I was welcome to come back any time in French, which tickled me.

    Different folks moved out of the way when I stopped for a photo, others posed most graciously when asked, others complimented me on my efforts to speak French. Another lady saw me taking a photo of a Smart car in the Marais. She discerned I must be American to take a photo of such a silly subject. She inquired "American?" using the English pronunciation. I replied, "Oui, je suis Americain - Etats Unis" using very limited French. She then said "Bravo, l'Americain" at my feeble efforts.

    Photos: Feb 06

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Skipping lines
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  • Nôtre Dame - Portal of the Virgin - Paris
    Nôtre Dame - Portal of
    the Virgin
    by BeatChick
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    While standing in line at Nôtre Dame Easter 2003, waiting for the church to open up for the Pâques mass, I turned around to strike up a conversation with a couple from Atlanta; when I turned around a French man had ducked in front of me! I tried to explain to him that he had skipped line but apparently he didn’t understand the concept.

    For the 1st time of this entire trip I didn’t have the ability to convey my meaning, not even thru hand gestures. Presently, he moved off to the side to carry on a conversation with another person so I moved on up to claim my spot RIGHT NEXT TO THE GATE (sucker). The Atlanta couple & I shared a moment of bemused eye rolling.

    Perhaps it's true what they say about the fundamental difference between the English & the French: the former know how to queue up in line and the latter don't! Now I don't wish to further any stereotypes but I do think it was funny and it was definitely an eye-opening cultural experience.

    So the best thing to do is stake your claim on your spot but if someone happens to move ahead of you just chalk it up to cultural differences, try not to be offended, laugh it off. You are here to have a good time, attitude is everything and a good one will carry you far. It is France after all - c'est la vie!

    Address: 6, Place du Parvis, Ile de la Cité, 75004 PARIS (Ile de la Cité - you can't miss it - it's at the historical center of Paris!)

    Photo: March 2001

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Don't expect a smile
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  • As an American, I think we expect a certain level of cordiality when meeting people, Either in the workplace or just going down the street we pretty much feel offended if a smile is not given or returned. For many countries in Europe this is just not done and France is one of these. On my first trip to Paris I misunderstood this to be rudeness. Of all the people in Paris I’ve met on our three trips there, I can honestly say I only met one person who was truly rude. That’s probably not much different then in the US. On out last trip it was around midnight and we were having a big problem finding our hotel. A lady saw our distress, asked us what the problem was and proceeded to walk us to out hotel even though it was out of her way.

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Privacy
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  • One of the most stricking differences for overseas tourists, especially Anglo-Saxons is the conception and importance of privacy.

    Paris is a very densly populated city. People are always surrounded by other people, and it is not rare in a restaurant or bar to have to share your table with a total stranger.

    The Parisians will completly ignore you. This is often misunterpreted as being snob or snotty. For a Parisian, it is a mark of respect and politness. Privacy is very important, because there is so little of it...

    On the other hand, if someone talks to you in a restaurant or bar, it means that he/she really means it!

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: People in glass houses...
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  • Yes, I had a bad experience (read my sports tips) with people some people in Paris. It was pretty crappy, but you know what, that was a few people out of a whole country and I'm not going to condemn the city of Paris because of the actions of two.

    People are the same no matter where you go. Some are nice and some are not. Please get over the stereotype that Parisians are rude or snotty. And don't encourage the stereotype by approaching a local with a chip on your shoulder.

    Look, before you go to any country where the main language is something other than English you should take it upon yourself to learn 4 or 5 simple phrases. It's not to appease the locals, but to help you along on your trip. Learn to say Hello, Goodbye, Please, Thank You, and for christ's sake, learn how to ask for help. This is for your benefit, but it also makes local people happy to see that you are trying to speak the local language. This will make for helpful and pleasant interactions.

    Finally, the only reason I was able to go to Paris at all was because of the generosity of a Parisian. I was introduced to a girl from Paris through a friend and she invited me to come and stay in Paris with her in her apartment. That's some pretty incredible hospitality from someone who only spent a few days with myself and our mutual friend in the states. I stayed with her and she took time off of work and school to show me around her city. It was a huge demonstration of hospitality on her part and that's something I can probably never repay her for.

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Le sens de l'humour français
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  • Collingnon... down the john! - Paris
    Collingnon... down the john!
    by davequ
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    I can't help but laugh at the French sense of humor expressed in the film Amelie
    (Le fabuleux destin d'Amelie Poulain)
    during (Jamel Debbouze) Lucien's recitation of the merits and character of the vile "Collignon."

    One negative effect of the film "Amelie" is intensified overcrowding and gentrification of Montmartre,
    but let's face it, parts of this movie are funny and overall it's a good film.

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    Stereotypes: Rude, or friendly?: Hurry !!
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  • Well I'm French and a Parisian, so I can be fair on that one.
    But.
    Parisians don't hate foreigners, they just don't care.
    Parisians are not on holidays, they work ! You enjoy some relaxing time there, but, for them, Paris means "everyday, pressuring life".

    They are always in a hurry !
    Whatever the place they go (for business or for pleasure), they want to be there as fast as possible , especially if they are late ;-)
    Means, they walk as quickly as possible and they moan about those "tourists in front of them who walk so slowly and don't move" !!

    Parisians, and French people, are not "immeidalty friendly" unlike the Americans. You don't become friend with them just by saying "Hello !". But once you're friends with a French person, she/he won't forget you the minute you're left !

    Sometines people are rude, sometimes they aure very friendly. Depends on the person and on her/his mood... just like you !

    Best advice : whatever the country and the city you are visiting, keep an open mind and don't believe strereotypes. Most ofter they are wrong !

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